Deviation Actions

Martin-III's avatar

Trust Issues

By
Published:
325 Views

Description

My submission to the Legacy of the Shining Series Contest.  For the moment, I'm pleasantly surprised with how well this turned out, though I suspect it might be better if extended a few more scenes.
© 2015 - 2024 Martin-III
Comments4
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
cullsoft's avatar
Maybe it's just from reading some of his short stories recently in tribute, but this feels very reminiscent of Terry Pratchett's style of writing. In a very good way. :)

Like the way you've given Milo - and to an extent Hiro - an introduction and how you've described them. It gives the feel that this is an extract from a much larger SITD-inspired story! :) What's especially good is how Milo's seemingly shifty appearance (especially those eyebrows! ;) ) helps to set up the attitudes towards him and Pyra in SITD - perhaps also unfairly from appearances.

One thing I might suggest adding? Milo doesn't seem to be scratching himself! ;)